The internet has changed the way we meet romantic partners. And thanks to newly emerging sites, the internet is even changing the way we meet co-parents.
Typically, a co-parenting arrangement results from parental divorce or separation. Such an arrangement can be complicated, especially when parents struggle with anger, resentment or hostility toward each other. To eliminate the potentially painful dynamic between parents who are former partners, some people are seeking out new ways co-parent. And they are finding a solution online.
Instead of turning to the internet to meet potential mates and spouses, hopeful parents-to-be are getting online to find prospective co-parents. As this article explains, several sites have been developed to connect people looking to start a family, not a romantic relationship.
Users can find partners based on their parenting styles, lifestyles and values.
These sites could be an attractive option to someone who wants to start a family but does not want or have the opportunity to follow the traditional route of meeting someone and developing a relationship before having kids. The sites attract career-driven people, those in the LGBTQ community and men and women who feel like they want to have children before a certain age, among others.
Proceeding with caution
An opportunity to choose your co-parent can be an attractive option. However, there are some caveats to consider. First, without marriage or an existing relationship, it can be impossible to know what the other person is like under pressure and in stressful situations. Trust does not come quickly, either.
Second, parenting with anyone is a challenge. Disagreements come up; people make mistakes. Knowing how to find resolutions effectively and cooperatively does not come easily for many people, especially new parents dealing with high levels of anxiety and stress.
With these challenges in mind, anyone considering these co-parenting sites will want to approach the relationship from a pragmatic, protective position.
- Get agreements in writing.
- Have a clear and comprehensive parenting plan in place.
- Be specific and honest in how you plan to raise a child.
- Discuss legal rights and your financial expectations.
Choosing to have a child with someone with whom you have no romantic or personal relationship is a risk, but it can be a risk worth taking as long as you are prepared.