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Mistakes parents make when facing false allegations by an ex

Oct 22, 2020 | Child Custody

Amid a child custody case, some parents resort to manufacturing complaints or destructive behaviors of their ex to make them look bad.

These accusations can be enormously upsetting to the targets of these allegations. While it can feel justified to lash out at the accuser, this could ultimately be one of the most common mistakes people make when they are wrongfully accused of something during a child custody dispute.

Common mistakes to avoid

Screaming or making threats when someone accuses you of something you did not do is a common reaction. However, it can backfire as it can make you appear volatile and unstable. And when you react this way in front of your kids, the behavior can seem especially impulsive.

The same goes for physical responses. Throwing things or hitting someone can be harmful to your case. Even if you did not have a history of violent behavior in the past, a reaction like this could give courts reason to believe your child might be in physical danger in your care.

Taking revenge on social media can also be a costly mistake. People who feel wronged might share pictures, make statements or reveal personal information to try and “get even.” However, these actions can come back to haunt you in court, where everything you say and do is under a microscope. Further, your children can be embarrassed and angry.

What should I do?

If your ex accuses you of something like abuse or violence to hurt you and jeopardize your parenting rights during a legal dispute, try to stay calm and clear-headed. There are legitimate, lawful ways to defend yourself and your fitness as a parent.

Talking to an attorney right away can be a critical first step. A legal representative can be your advocate and help you decide how to defend yourself. An attorney can also provide guidance if you choose to take legal action against the accuser for making false statements.

You should also keep diligent records of your interactions with your ex. Keep voicemails, track conversations, and make notes of what you discuss.

Finally, avoid physical interactions with your ex, social media and any situation that could give your ex more material. Having legal support and refusing to engage with your ex can help you get through this difficult situation more easily.